On Monday morning at Strawberry Fields in Kamakura I had a naughtyish splurge on a cache : for sixty pounds sterling, a vintage 30ml Opium parfum, a No 19, a Caron Fleurs De Rocaille extrait, but these were kind of thrown in, really, because the real purchase, and prize, was this vintage edition of Amouage Cristal for men ( or possibly Gold? Experts please weigh in ) that was roaring to me silently from the top of the glass shelf.









The bottom of the bottle says Cristal, apparently a rare perfume on eBay that sells for around 1,000 dollars  – the Japanese internet has one for half that









but the notes do seem to match those of Gold, an intense ( though this word doesn’t do it justice, not remotely ; I have never known anything like it ), aldehydically animalic, musky soapy floral that smells just like a pristine extract of Madame Rochas parfum on United Arab Emirates steroids and cristillated to spectacularly nuclear strength.









The second I sprayed this oily, golden slick of perfume on the back of my hand I experienced a delirium tremens of being enveloped, head to toe, in regal downiness and flowers; rose, jasmine, but most specifically a powdery sandalwood and overall smell that reminded me very specifically of Imperial Leather soap – which I have always loved, and can use up a whole bar of in one long sitting…………….despite the swirl of richness gradually coalescing into one skin smell, the overall feeling is definitely that familiar scent; I use the talc and the deodorant spray, and having this too as the main event after all that initial background pampering will be orgiastically pleasurable for me. I was practically WRITHING on the train back home in olfactory arousal: tending and loosening like a cat in heat ……  perhaps the sublimated civet, that I experience without consciously sensing it: some secret code of sensuality immersed in the blend that makes it just so horny yet so MAJESTIQUE.




















To me, anyway.





D was having none of it.






“it smells……. pissy, or something” he said when we met in Ofuna : “I don’t like it”.













And on Basenotes :





“Musky, soapy floral, like taking a bath in the clawfoot tub of my gtandmother’s house in the seventies “




says one reviewer.




“I got through the initial blast of granny’s partially soiled bloomers, tiptoeing around the house trying to avoid my wife”,





says another.





Most other reviewers spin variations on this ‘old lady’ incontinence theme ( WHICH I DON’T GET AT ALL ::: I JUST SMELL SWOONWORTHY ARAB PRINCES IN WHITE ROBES )




– an (ageist, sexist ?), scaredy-cat reaction to a man’s scent that veers from the usual, ‘masculine’ brutality? Or maybe Duncan is right after all and I am just blind : though he does like the beginning, which is glorious: derailingly erotic for me personally, there is something in the base he can’t abide. A grimacing recoil.  It almost makes me fearful, like some dreaded halitosis I am unaware of, that my olfactory apparatus has gone awry. Why does it smell like that to him ??????





As another reviewer of the perfume says,    (as I mentioned I think this perfume must be Gold, (though please correct me if I am wrong) / could the ‘cristal’ on the glass be just referring to the material of which the bottle is made? It does feel ludicrously expensive]]










Yes. That was what I was wanting to say.





Wow is precisely the word I would use to describe this extravagant creation.




Which obviously I am only going to be able to wear indulgently alone, doors locked and bolted ,at home.














Filed under amber floral musks, Antidotes to the banality of modern times, Civet, Classics, Floral Aldehydes, FUCK EVERYTHING, Hairy Masculines, LUXURIANCE, Masculines, Musk, New Beginnings, occasionally sickening scents, PERFUME AND PERFORMANCE, pigs, postcards from the edge, Powder, Psychodrama, Urine

41 responses to “ALL OVER MYSELF ::::::::: CRISTAL Pour Homme by AMOUAGE

  1. bibimaizoon

    My uncle in Baton Rouge has a crystal dagger bottle with silver fittings just like that. He says the box is labeled Amouage “Silver Cristal” eau de parfum for men and is from 1998. Those old Amouages are really sumpthin’! Not for the faint of heart!

  2. Nelleke Oepkes aka Booknose

    Wow yes.
    Truly vintage Black Narcissus!
    And sooo nice to awaken to: after a slightly nightmarish night induced by falling asleep with Sherlock Holmes ringing in my ears on audio …
    I feel like I am meeting you all over again!
    And I was feeling so gutted after hearing of the fire in the Notre Dame
    Merci beaucoup cher M Ginza!!

  3. Matty

    That sounds like a real powerhouse. Not for the faint hearted. X

  4. thisispaloma

    How you made me laugh this mizzly morning in Ireland .

    D may come round if you drip feed him tiny barely perceptible drops at a time .

    I have gone from practically wretching at a scent to full blown addiction.

    Wear him down stealthily- you deserve to be craved wearing this treasure;)

  5. I have the woman’s version which is on a shorter square bottle which I purchased when it first came out years ago and the first I had heard of Amouage. From what I have read, ithe juice is the original formula of Gold abs the “crystal” refers to the special bottle.

    • Sorry for the typos, I responded while trying to get out the door for work. I took a photo of my bottle but I don’t think it posted. The crystal only refers to the bottle and the perfume itself was the original formula of Gold. It was a special and limited edition.

      • I didn’t notice any typos. I was also unable to edit the mangled penultimate paragraph on this asshole of a phone, which horrifies me, that people might think me illiterate

    • I thought so.

      How LOVELY it is, in all regards.

      I am infatuated ( as you may have gathered )

  6. Neil, my bottle is beautiful and even though it is fairly old, it still smells as beautiful as when I first bought it.

  7. Wow what a find!! Bravo, and yes I think you’re spot-on i thinking that it might be a sort of “gender mistrust”. Perfectly fine, more for the rest of us who are fond of the elusive vintage skank!

  8. Tara C

    Like Filomena, I have the vintage women’s bottle, commonly referred to as the mosque bottle because of its shape. Totally gorgeous. Congratulations on your treasure! I agree you need to habituate D to it with homeopathic doses until he succumbs to its seduction.

  9. Neil, you do things to my brain that feel like Alice’s Looking Glass has opened up to allow me into a world that might finally be ‘home’.

    If you get this response from Cristal, there is NOTHING wrong with you. It is what Mr Ford wishes he could ellicit from his buyers, but gets nowhere near. THIS is what FUCKING FABULOUS will never be.

  10. Robin

    I’m with you on the vintage Gold. Ric, however, is with Duncan: not just with Gold, but virtually all Amouages. Thank God he’s okay with Jubilation 25, my far-and-away favourite. But the rest just collect dust, sadly . . .

    So glad you got a nice haul. Yikes. Can one ever have too much No 19? (I know how essential it is to your existence.) And as it happens, just this last month I fell in love with vintage Fleurs de Rocaille all over again, so my memory of its appreciable charms is fresh and it’s great you snagged some. Wish I had your extrait, but my old squarish bottle of edt is quite the dignified little bomb. Amazing that it’s still in excellent nick. It really shouldn’t be. But I ain’t complainin’.

    • I hope Ric is now strong and mobile enough to flee the Amouages when they get too much:

      What are your thoughts on Rocaille ? I always find it somehow pathetic and poignant

      • Robin

        One person’s pathetic and poignant is another’s tender and nuanced, I guess. I admit I’m a sucker for delicate aldehydic woody florals, so maybe I’m not especially discriminating!

        I wish we were neighbours. I’d be over in a minute to take that extrait off your hands.


        Don’t get me wrong. I think it is very beautiful, and pathetic in the classical, tragic sense. I’d love to just sense someone wearing it on the street

  11. katherinec

    Haha, amazing. I’m transported by the whole thing, and the idea of using a whole bar of Imperial Leather in one sitting is, just incredible, like transmuting into something else. I love it.

  12. Matty

    Hi Neil
    Your book has just arrived, can’t wait to open it XXXX

  13. tora

    I loved this!! You made me laugh. And I am Dying to smell this!! I know that on me or to my nose, civet smells sweet and warm and comforting and elegant. But I know that others smell skank. I wonder what is wrong with me??? So reading this was so fun. Thanks, Neil.

  14. Simon

    I have an Amouage Cristal & Gold bottle from around 1993. I acquired it in Oman at the Al Bustan hotel. Beautiful place and a beautiful bottle.

    • We are thinking about going to Oman next summer. What a gorgeous smell Gold is

    • Just checked that hotel : looks gorgeous but too pricey for my descended yen pockets

      • Simon

        Oman is amazing and the people so friendly. I know what you mean about the hotel – I was lucky to go there when I did, it is beautiful but now super expensive! (by the way, if you know anyone who would like to buy a vintage Amouage – let me know). I am sure you will find a reasonable place to stay in Muscat with tours out to the desert!

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