So stupid of me to leave the entrance window open.



But it is pouring with rain today, torrential, and the cat needed an exit in case she wanted to go out, even if it looked as though she were about to spend the entire day curled up cosily inside. But that bastard one-eyed tom, the one that terrorises her,  has obviously found it and come inside at its own filthy leisure and ‘sprayed’ (oh such a euphemism) the entire, bloody, place.


It stinks. I want to kill it. All that incense and room sprays for nothing.



I want to press the eject button out of my house.






Filed under Flowers



  2. Kill it. You know how I love cats.

  3. My partner once went round and remonstrated with the kind elderly couple whose garden backs on to ours when their cat shat repeatedly in our flower bed. He found his rant very satisfying. I was mortified – what, exactly, did he expect them to do?

    • That’s the problem. Our cat is very much the ‘lady’ (or so she likes to make out and we lap it up happily) and thus we have the idea that such things never even happen. Who knows whose geraniums are defiled by our missy’s ammonia. But as you know I did enjoy your cat hating post even though I live with one myself. Duncan is the feliphile: I sway between the borders. Though tonight I am more along the lines of an early Clint Eastwood.

  4. Lilybelle

    That would absolutely infuriate me. Maybe Nature’s Miracle or something similar? It’s supposed to have enzymes that eat the animal spray, urine, etc. away.

    • Oh lily I am in hell. That fucker has seriously pissed upstairs (pardon my French: asterixes and all will no longer do). It seems to have particularly enjoyed wrecking the velvet curtains and all the cushions.


      I of course won’t actually hurt it if I see it (though I may pour a bathtub of boiling oil over its rank carcass a la medievale if I get the chance), no but seriously – as D says, it is just following its instinct and it is basically my fault. D warned me. Usually we have upstairs open where only our supercat Mori can jump across the balcony -= no other cat could manage it – but it makes the room upstairs freezing when we get in and impossible to heat afterwards. I thought the old bastard mog wouldn’t notice Mori’s own personal entrance.

      How stupid of me. The house now smells, through its entirety, as if some smelly otaku had just come and urinated over the entire space.

      REVOLTING !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  5. Ugh. So sorry for you! Some good tips here, and in the comments on it: http://www.animalplanet.com/pets/10-tips-for-cleaning-cat-urine/

    • Arigato. Tomorrow shall be a day of cat-wee clearing fury. I worry about the smell of vinegar though: I do love it (to the extent that I can literally drink it), but hate its lingering smell, particularly in association with that FOUL puss.

      Perhaps the baking soda thing will have to be the way.

  6. I’m so sorry Neil. I’m not a cat person and can just imagine what my reaction would be if it were me.

    I found this on the web. I did something similar a while back when I was pet-sitting for someone. It’s laborious and time consuming, but it works.


    • Thanks. D is already asleep in the room though so I guess we are not going to be able to clean tonight, but instead will lie down in filth and just try to live with it.


      As for the ‘cat person’ thing as I have said earlier here, I have one (but we found her by accident – there was no plan to adopt a kitten but she had been left by a trashcan in the middle of the forest and was so cute) and I care for her in my own way, but Duncan is a TOTAL cat person. They commune when he gets in at night and it is fascinating to watch. They sleep right next to each other – total lovers. With me it is a more wary (but still loving, kind of ) relationship when both of us are in the mood. And they certainly smell better than dogs, anyway. Dogs are ‘adorable’ etc etc but really, the smells they produce I abhor on the deepest level.

      • I always think dogs smell like Fritos — which I think is adorable because how can you not love an animal that smells like an industrial corn chip???? 🙂

        In any case, I hope that you manage to get some rest tonight. Just a quick think about enzyme sprays like Nature’s Miracle. They *work,” but it takes a while for the enzymes to break down the urine. It doesn’t happen overnight, sadly, and if I remember from the last time that I had to use one, it took about 2 weeks to start noticing a difference.

  7. De

    Bac-Out by Biokleen has been effective when I had a wood floor problem. I actually let it set for awhile then washed floor with one of their soaps and reapplied. It made an immediate difference and overtime seemed to disintegrate the substance which caused the odor which is what is effective. I’ve found their products to work well together for fabrics with the layering process too. Oh tomcat spray 😦

  8. Marina

    Horrible! And hilarious!!
    How about Elizabeth Arden Red Door or Lix Taylor’s White Diamonds then spray the fuck out of the place.

  9. You definitely have to go to the pet store and buy one of the enzymatic cleaners that breaks down urine. I am a total cat person, but the thought of that hideous smell…well I got rid of two of my cats because of that problem. We have used the Nature’s Miracle to deal with cat urine and it worked wonders. Not sure if that is sold in Japan, but I am sure they have an equally effective product. Good luck.

    • Yes, that sounds like the best option although our standard cleaning techniques and a lot of perfume seem to have basically done the trick.

      And given the title of this post, is ‘got rid of’ a euphemism?

      (only joking!)

  10. I completely understand where your coming from, because I was a ‘loco on the calles,’ at one time.”

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