EILISH I (2021), EILISH 2 (2022) + EILISH 3 (2023) BY BILLIE EILISH

guest post by Esther

Before I start on the perfumes, I want to get across how much Billie Eilish means to me, just for some context, you could say. I started liking her in 2019 and my love for her has only grown bigger as the days have gone by. She takes up 90% of my thoughts pretty much all of the time to be honest. I use my school printing credit to print out pictures of her and stick them to my wall, and I lie in bed looking at them for a bit, which sounds creepy but oh well. I went to her concert in 2022 and it was the best day of my life, even though I was at the back, her performance was incredible. I’m pretty sure she looked at me when she swung out into the crowd on a big crane, but this might just be my obsessive brain tricking me into thinking I had some sort of interaction with her, which seems more likely. After the show, she drove past the mob of fans waiting for her, she was looking out of the window, and I was very close to her, it took me a long time to recover; I still think about it now, which makes me question if I ever fully recovered. Probably not. I talk about her so much, my family may be sick of it, this has not stopped me in any way, and they will just have to deal with it. 

And of course, the starting point for all of this was her music. I first started listening to her in 2019, like I said. My cousin, Athena, loved her and that’s when I first heard her. I carried on listening until I became a genuine fan and started memorising every single lyric to every single song. I started getting progressively more obsessed, until I became the unhealthily obsessed fanatic I am now. Her music means a ridiculous amount to me and has helped me so much throughout the years. Whenever I listen to her, all other thoughts disappear and I just get sucked into the incredible music that Billie and Finneas have made. When she sings, it sounds so genuine and from the heart, not acted or staged. I genuinely can’t put into words how much her and her music means to me. I love her so much. Her music is so relatable, and despite it being ‘sad’ music, it always cheers me up and helps when I have had a bad day. When I was around 10 or 11 I wasn’t having a good time at school and when I came home, I listened to Billie and pretty much forgot the bad feelings. Now whenever I feel sad or anxious, I just listen to her music and feel so much better. A lot of her songs are very calming and relaxed, but she obviously has more upbeat songs too, like Oxytocin or I Didn’t Change My Number. It is weird that someone who doesn’t even know I exist, means so, so, so, so, so, so, so (okay I should stop this will go on forever) much to me. 

It’s not that I just love her music, I adore everything about her. I would take a bullet for her. Having this level of fandom is almost scary, but I LOVE IT. Every time I think of her (which, like I said is 90% of the time) my love and adoration only gets bigger, and stronger.  Every time I watch her interviews (which is also a lot of the time) I love her even more, she’s so genuine and kind, she does what she wants and doesn’t care what anyone thinks – a perfect person. 

I got the first Billie Eilish perfume, Eilish, for my birthday a couple years back, and I was so excited. Even though she makes music herself, the fact that she made this felt more special, more intimate. It means so much to me that she wears it too, I almost have a connection with her. Wearing tee shirts from concerts is a big part of my fandom, but she doesn’t wear the tee shirts too. She does wear the perfumes though and the thought of this, is so amazing to me. The feeling of watching her get ready for the Met Gala and seeing her put Eilish Number 2 on, the fact I had that exact thing, was incredible, it felt like I was even more of a fan in a way, because I could smell something that she had created. Smell is such an intimate thing, way more than just wearing something. The scent of the first perfume is predominantly vanilla and is quite warm. This is perhaps a more feminine perfume but is genderfluid at the same time, definitely for the spring and early to mid-summertime. It is chocolatey and a little spicy, quite strong and lingers for a long time, it makes me feel almost sleepy. I don’t really connect it with a specific event, but I do connect it with a lot of good times over the past few years. 

I was given the second perfume before she had officially announced it in Europe (where I live) which was insane to me, beyond exciting. The scent is more masculine, which aligns with me better than the more feminine first perfume, although I wear the first one a lot in the summer. The tones are muskier and woodier, giving it a more wintery, masculine smell. I wear this one a lot more often, as it feels good in autumn and late summer as well as winter. The bottle for Eilish 2 is dark, matching the scent, whereas the Eilish 1 is gold, also suited to the smell. It was my Aunt Georgia and cousin Athena who thought to buy it for me, which gives it even more of a sentimental value, as I don’t see them a lot and they are very close family. When I opened it and saw her face I was completely stunned and thrilled. The fact I had the ‘collection’ now, meant a lot. It’s not like they were little plastic toys that are easy to get and would get thrown away, they were perfumes in gorgeous bottles! I also associate this one with lots of good times, they are just more recent and there are more of them. I put this one on and I feel connected to her again and powerful.   

She is apparently bringing out a third, limited edition perfume (maybe with cherry notes?), Eilish No.3, in November. I am really, really hoping that I might get it for Christmas.