I thought I might be able to avoid feeling this way this year, and it is true that I am nowhere near this time as poisoned. But today, my mental toxicity is high. I have a wonderful life here in Japan on the whole, and I think this usually comes through clearly on a The Black Narcissus.
But pre- entrance exams, though I truly love most of my students, I just start to gradually lose my mind.
My nerves are SHOT.
I am vastly, and violently, irritable.
But I think this crap from last year that I wrote in a fit of expunging my madnesses describes it really much better.
You truly have no idea how f***ed up the work culture is here in this country: the exhaustion that the Japanese put themselves through. And yet, the eternal paradox: the place is fun to live in, he says unconvincingly.
Today I just wanted to commit mass murder….
Poor Mr. Ginza. 🙁 Sending you soothing best wishes.
Arigato. I am a nutter this week, but venting sure does help even if I make a total fool of myself before the world.
Work is truly loathsome at times. You have my sympathy.
It’s not the work itself, it’s the amount of it (for this thankfully limited time period) and the ludicrously sadomasochistic culture that surrounds it.
I sometimes truly think that Japan is simply insane. Wonderfully insane.
What is the saying? I believe it is “…and this too shall pass” . A wee bit twee but relevant nonetheless. You will be able to take a deep inhalation of any number of glorious scents and refresh yourself. That is a magical thing to be able to do. Now have a nice drink and breathe deeply 🙂
Arigato.
I wish I had more control over my emotions, but I don’t. They control me. Yesterday I had to, though, just REPRESS, REPRESS, and try to act professional, and then when I got home I couldn’t sleep. But I did, eventually, and then this gorgeous snow is so delightfully head clearing….
What do you do when you are psychologically burnt out?
I usually scream a little bit just to let everything out. Then have a glorious piece of Leonidas chocolat and hope for the best. I find chocolat to be a most beneficial type of medicine at moments like these.