Monthly Archives: November 2012

MARSHMALLOW GIT: Divin Enfant by Etat Libre d’Orange (2006)

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The infant-baiting song ‘His majesty the baby’, by Scottish singer Momus, has a protagonist who ‘swallows breasts as big as mountains’ and commands the attention of a cooing clan of women, much to the singer’s disgust and jealousy. The ‘bald and dribbling little git’ has his audience rapt and can do no wrong.

 

This is also, incidentally,  the theme of Etat Libre d’Orange’s ‘Divin Enfant’: the story of a baby, a ‘polymorphic pervert’, who smells so beautiful and sweet that he can pull the cotton wool over your doting eyes and behave like the devil.

 

Or so they’d have you believe

 

(“ …..leather and cold tobacco, a shrilling symbol of our sleepless nights….” )

 

 

 

In fact, this is probably the softest, cutest and easiest to wear of all orange blossoms. The threatened leather (‘the faked innocence of a demon’) barely materializes; except as a duvet, over which the orange blossom, (rounded, tamed, baby-friendly) reigns.

 

 

 

 

 

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Filed under Marsh Mallow, Orange Blossom, Perfume Reviews

La rosée du matin : SLOANE ROSE by ATELIER FLOU (2010)

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There is something quite brazen about calling a posh girl’s rose scent ‘Sloane Rose’, a perfume bafflingly described by its perfumers as ‘resolutely out of time’.

Perhaps she is. Stealing outside at her friend Rosine’s estate; pinching blooms; self-aware and cannily barefoot in the dawn. A delicate, blackberry-dewed rose, with succulent petals and a strawberry creamed wink in the underglow, as the lights in the house remain off and she revels for the moment in the freedom and privilege she was born into:

 

 

(‘ahhh…….Polesden Lacey………!’)

 

 

An effect, light and rather pleasing ma petite choux fleur, produced by rose of manila, orange; Scandinavian violet; a touch of cedar; and Chenaï jasmine sambac.

 

With its crisp opening, as the orange and the jasmine clasp the stems of this fresh morning English rose, the scent is simple, fruity and a little bit petulant.  Not daring, as asserted by Flou: but actually…….really rather scrumptious.

 

 

 

 

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Filed under Flowers, Perfume Reviews, Rose

Lips and hips : FEMME by Rochas (1944)

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Yesterday I wrote about the wonderful experience that is the Shinagawa flea market in Tokyo, and I forgot to mention one of the scents that I once found there….

And I was thinking. Are these vintage classics that I am so excited to find in their original incarnations mere museum pieces; dusty relics that smell so dated they become laughable?

Or can classic perfumes still be sexy? Can they appeal in the modern age?

It would seem so. One Sunday, a few years ago, our dinner guests, Penny and Terry, sampled the myriad delights of the perfume cabinet and its latest acquisitions. And despite all the goods on offer, the perfume that got the unanimous wow was, to my total amazement, an old, pre-formulation edition of that timeless classic, Femme. Neither of these two is old-fashioned in their tastes (Terri goes for fresh, modern tuberose and wears it well, Penny more the Indian amber and khus), yet somehow this smooth, voluptuous peach of a scent had them inhaling and inhaling  (at this point, possibly from elbows, knees and ankles, so much skin space had been covered in scent – this was one of my last pitches).

 

 

How could such an old classic garner such a response?

Because, quite simply, they don’t make them like this any more. Femme was a splendid scent, as rounded and full-bodied as it is possible to be without ever becoming obvious.

 

 

The perfume clearly has powers of seduction (my friends were up in arms over its sexual magnetism), personified as well in the muse for the perfume, Mae West. Marcel Rochas, head of the house, did a clever thing when he modeled the curves of the original bottle on the hips of his most famous client (the Chantilly black lace of the corset the couturier created for her forms the main design on the box.) At the time of the perfume’s release Ms West was the box office and theatre’s greatest star. West was hilarious, the queen of steamy one liners, and the world  needed cheering.

 

 

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It was nearing the end of the second world war and amid the ruins of Paris, or so legend has it, the great perfumer Edmond Roudnitska was determined to create something happy to banish the ghosts of grey. He had happened upon a perfumery material in one of the laboratory vats, a gourmand ‘apricot-brioche’ molecule that would be the starting point for the perfume that later became the ravishing Femme.

 

 

 

There are two other famous scents to which Femme can be directly compared, its blood relatives: Mitsouko (1918), and Pour Monsieur (1953). All belong to the fruity chypre category. In fact, wear all three and after ninety minutes you will barely be able to distinguish them.

 

Where Mitsouko  (a beautiful, serious creation ) is not conventionally sexed – though its dark spice has intrigue – spiked, undercurrents of piquant green, spices and earth make it forever cerebral, removed. Femme takes the same olfactory template of warm mosses, flowers, spices and fruit, but if Mitsouko is a cool dark wood, then Femme is an orchard of peaches ripening in the sun. It is this full peach note, undercut with plum, fused brilliantly with velvety flowers and warm woody notes of cedar, sandalwood and civet that makes it that much the sunnier of the two: moss suffused with light, a tantalizing scent like a second skin.

 

 

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Funnily enough, the scent isn’t in the least bit redolent of Mae West (Rochas had had it made originally for his demure wife Helène, the legendary Madame Rochas, before Mae become the perfume’s face and derriere):  Roudnitska’s formula was so flawless you can’t even see the seams, never mind rip open the bodice. There is nothing throaty about this scent. It is perfect.

 

 

And yet in 1989 Rochas scandalously commissioned another perfumer to reorchestrate the classic – against the wishes of its creator, and thus vulgarized a work of art. The new version, though capturing the fundamental feel of the original, is brassier, louder – probably more like the inimitable Ms West, who once quipped on stage: ‘I feel like a million tonight. But one at a time.’

 

 

 

 

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Filed under Chypre, Flowers, Perfume Reviews

PERFUME BONANZA AT THE SHINAGAWA FLEA MARKET, TOKYO

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As with any metropolis, there are a good few flea markets at weekends in Tokyo, scattered about the city selling old kimonos, antiques, forgotten ornaments and bric-a-brac;  clothes, vinyl – any old junk to pique your curiosity. Perfume is not a major component of the majority of these places, although you will occasionally come across some unwanted bottle thrown in with rings, lipsticks and old necklaces: perhaps it is not something that the majority of marketgoers are really looking for.

The Japanese relationship with perfume is quite different to that of the west. Scent is of course worn by some people, especially high school girls and boys (who go for quite sweet, brash and trashy domestic brands, almost as a retort to the older, more conservative generation), and all department stores have perfume sections, just like anywhere else. And yet. If you look at the people who are tentatively browsing the fragrance sections, it is as though they are not really sure what they are looking at, as if they are almost afraid of perfume.  They will rarely actually spray any on the skin (it’s always funny when some gaijin – foreigner – like me comes in and sprays with abandoned liberation), usually instead sampling it vagely on a paper strip, at a distance, as an assistant politely explains its virtues.

Perhaps I generalize: naturally there are fragrance fanatics and perfumistas here; you do smell perfume sometimes when you are out in the city (though no way near as much as in Europe, which I realized over this summer), but on the whole it is not something the Japanese do spontaneously. It is more intuitive to be unscented: to be clean, yes, but as unobtrusive as possible. Self-effacement is key in this society.

In terms of perfume itself, this has had its pluses and its minuses, in that the selection of perfume available is quite poor compared to other capitals. I yearn for a Liberty, an Aedes Venustas, KaDeWe or Japanese equivalent thereof, packed to the rafters with niche and obscure, edgy fragrances, but the only decent place to shop, really, is Isetan in Shinjuku, which has Lutens, Penhaligons, Santa Maria Novella and some others; fun, but not enough to satisfy the truly voracious perfume hunter.

On the other hand, when it comes to second hand, unused, unwanted vintage perfume, Japan is heaven on earth. This is a place where appearance is paramount, where gift-giving is an art, where ‘brand goods’, as they are called here, have very high cachet. Thus perfume –  Guerlain, Lanvin, Dior – will often have been gratefully received as an obviously expensive present, perhaps as an omiyage (souvenir) from some overseas trip to Paris or London, but never opened. It is more of an acquistion than something to use. All across Japan there will be vintage parfums in perfect condition sitting on fashionable women’s dressers, knowing full well, as they sit with their scented meniscus unmoving and still, that people like myself are yearning to get their hands on them, to be opened, released, and finally appreciated for what they were intended to be – worn.

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One way or another, these riches find their way into the hands of people who regularly set up stalls at fleamarkets every Sunday at the Shinagawa flea market I went to yesterday, which is more about chuko – second hand, unwanted things – than about art and Buddhist scrolls and calligraphy, the more precious antiques.  People sell off perfumes along with with their other bits and pieces as part of their stall, often blissfully unaware of their value. The aforementioned reverence of luxury brands, which I personally find ridiculous (picking up a piece of olfactory trash such as Bulgari Blu I am told, with great seriousness, sore wa Bulgari, that’s a Bulgari, as though I should be impressed), but the good thing is that its price tag will often be the same as, or more than, say, the pristine vintage extrait of Diorissimo that is sitting next to it.

What this means for the perfume lover like myself is that every time I go to the flea market my heart truly palpitates with anticipation as I enter the building, as you never know what might happen. I can feel my white and red blood cells surging forth (seriously, there is no greater boost for my mind and body than this place). There might be nothing, as frequently happens, or there could be such a cache that you can barely contain your hysteria. I remember one time in particular, quite soon after I had discovered the place, when I was lagging behind Duncan in going in and he rushed out towards me, wide-eyed, saying ‘Oh my god you are going to die when you see this one stall’. There was a woman whose grandmother had left an entire Guerlain collection: Mitsouko, Vol de Nuit, Shalimar, all in the most beautiful, velvet boxes, all parfums – plus Carons – Nuit de Noël, Fleurs de Rocaille, and Infini (my favourite), among others. I stood still in time: my heart stopped. And then I was semi-hyperventilating. To be honest, I had to walk around to calm myself down to gain some sang froid before returning, negotiating  and hoovering up what I could afford that day (all the Carons and Guerlains for a start). That Shalimar in particular has made me yearn thereafter to get my hands on more of the vintage stuff in that purple box- so warm, rich, so deep and absurdly magnetic that it makes the newer reformulations seem like a cruel joke…)

There was also, for a while, a woman who did know her stuff and thus priced things accordingly (there are also people who have no idea at all – I picked up a extrait of Guerlain Ode, an extraordinarily rare piece, and boxed, for 500 yen (about five pounds), tossed among the bric-a-brac as though it were rubbish) as well as Diorling and, to my astonishment once, vintage extraits of Chanel Gardénia and Cuir de Russie for a song. This more savvy perfume broker had nothing but classic vintage perfumes that I wanted – all of them. As I approached her stall (in a different place each time) my chest would constrict at the prospect of what might be about to happen…I remember getting an exquisite Calandre parfum from her that I treasure even now. There is only a bit left.

To be honest, sometimes when I go (not every week, or I would be bankrupt), I am actually happy when there is nothing that I want as it will be better for my bank balance. I am glad to just pick up a tie or two – my collection of vintage neckties is quite something due to this place as well – and leave feeling smug and virtuous.

Yesterday it was really bustling, with more stalls than usual. Duncan and I had met up with a friend Nicole, to saunter slowly through the place and then have a long late lunch in a nearby restaurant – a perfect Sunday for me. It was a bit chilly for the market stall owners sitting outside wrapped in their blankets, but in terms of atmosphere it was perfect, and I can only say that I spent the entire two hours we were there in a state of tenterhook ecstacy.

What was on offer there on this Sunday, November 11th?

Price guide

100 yen  = 79p, or 1.25 dollars, though I try to turn a blind eye…..

It was a good day yesterday at the flea market, even if I didn’t find any eye-busting masterpieces. Had I been completely without restraint I could have bought a large amount of vintage perfume, either for my collection, to sell perhaps on e-bay or just to give as presents to people. Among all the dross I found two or three perfect examples of prime Miss Dior in eau de toilette (800 yen) and 14ml parfum (4000, a bit pricey I thought but it smelled marvellous, just as it should, glowering from its bottle); a couple of Madame Rochas parfums de toilette (about 2000 yen, smelling good indeed) and a Calèche parfum or two (1800), although those were in the vaporisateur format, which I usually find don’t age as well (I have learned my lesson).

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There was a lot of Nº5, in extrait, eau de toilette and the rare eau de cologne, usually around the 3500 mark, which might seem expensive but still cheaper than what you would pay in for a newer edition. I am always on the look out for vintage Nº19 in parfum, and have come across the amazing 28ml bottles in the past for as little as 1500 yen. Just eleven pounds for that scented wonder of iris, leather and vetiver that is one of my top holy grails….Yesterday I really wanted to buy the vintage eau de toilette, a nice full bottle, as I have come round to the other strengths recently ( I have NO time whatsoever for the reformulations of this perfume, by the way, where all the expensive orris has been leached out and replaced with citric vetivers and some ingredient I can’t abide that makes it sharp and evil), as well as that classic eau de parfum, which I remember a girl at Cambridge I knew called Kia wearing constantly….damn I wish I had bought that now thinking about it, in a way to reinvigorate the scent with the myriad of different facets that get brought out at different times….(but you see then I wouldn’t have been able to buy lunch, and that is half the reason we were out in Shinagawa).

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Mmm, what else did I come across? I quite fancied buying Gucci Envy (2000yen) as a green work scent but resisted. There was a bit of Bal à Versailles about, but I have enough of that in my collection now, lots of L’Air du Temps vintage parfum (in fact one bottle, in perfect condition except for its slightly mouldy box, was only 400 yen!) But I only buy it to give to Helen, and I think she has enough for the time being so my coins stayed firmly in my pocket. One person was selling fake Coco roll ons, which I was surprised to see as usually everything is very bona fide article, but one sniff and I knew they were nothing to do with Chanel’s 80’s baroque classic. There were a few Egoïstes, and vintage Cristalles on offer as well, as well as the usual Mademoiselles and Chances.

I could go on and on (please do, cry the perfumistas).  If you looked hard enough, nestled in most of the stalls there was a perfume bottle or two – a lot of unwanted recent-ish fragrances à la Bulgari or Salvatore Ferragamo; I briefly considered a Monsieur de Givenchy après rasage that I wouldn’t have minded owning, but then decided that I would never wear it so there wasn’t much point (that whole civety citrus thing doesn’t really work for me). I am a Givenchy Gentleman fanatic (patchouli, rose and leather – classic) and have a huge stash of the vintage courtesy of this very flea market. I consider it as an alternative to Nº19 extrait – on me they dry down in a very similar fashion: elegant, sexy, but somewhat aloof. Both are two of my signature scents.

Duncan bought an antique Japanese wooden cabinet, some hip-hop cds and some ties, including a very nice vintage Giorgio Armani. I also bought loads of ties yesterday  – a 70’s YSL for 100 yen, one very classic kimono-patterned one and some rather garish things as well as I like to occasionally wear ties that have people thinking is that cool or is it actually quite hideous?

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But back to perfume.

Well I bought a couple of things I can’t write about because they might be birthday presents for friends  reading this. They were definitely good buys. The first other thing I bought for myself, from among a little box of miniatures (where the people don’t often realise they are small bottles because they are PARFUMS! I have had several Lauder Private Collection parfums this way) – a 3.7ml parfum of the original Chloë, which I always loved back in the day, that groggy, woozy tuberose in lace. That only cost me 100 yen (79p for a vintage extrait!!!!!) and its bottle, with its suggestion of aorta sticking out of the top, amused me. Next up was a perfume that smells almost identical, just a little fresher –  Tubéreuse by Les Fleurs de Deborah, a house I have never heard of before, but it is my sister’s name, and though she would never be caught dead in a scent this old dame (she is a Biagiotti Roma girl or wears Daim Blond) I thought it might be cute as a christmas present.

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I picked up an old room fragrance, Terre d’Ochre, by Esteban, which is quite nice in an Ungaro pour homme kind of way, and I couldn’t resist getting an old bottle of Lumière Rochas for 500 yen, simply because I had been reading about it on a Dior Poison thread on Bois de Jasmin and it had been lumped in with all those other 80’s rock queens that I have a secret penchant for. At dinner at Chez Tsubame, I sprayed some on a piece of tissue and my first comment, I must say, was that it smells like ‘a tart who has pissed herself’, though this is perhaps a bit ungracious: there is a sambac jasmine beachy orange blossom vibe going on within it that is actually quite sexy, a hair-tossing member of that whole flaming Red Door sorority.

One thing I absolutely couldn’t resist was an old mahjong set that I found somehow compelling. I doubt I would ever play it, as I have an extremely low IQ when it comes to strategic complexity and retaining rules, but my piano teacher has mahjong parties (there is something illicit about this game – it is illegal for minors for example, and I think you are not allowed to gamble either, by law…) so I might take it round next lesson and see what she thinks about it. The waiter in the restaurant said it is a very good set and an absolute megabargain for 500 yen. I also adore ‘Lust Caution’ by Ang Lee, that ravishingly beautiful and repressedly erotic film which features mahjong prominently (as a pretext for a Chinese spy to infiltrate the pro-Japanese Shanghai government). I stared at this mahjong set for quite a while and then decided I had to have it.

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At this point we were about to leave, and I espied an Eau de Fleurs by Nina Ricci that I felt I needed (1200 yen), a completist urge to add to my collection of vintage Riccis (Farouche, Signoricci, Capricci). I had somewhat gone over budget, so Nicole took pity on me and kindly got it for me as an upcoming birthday present.  I would never wear such a delicately feminine floral in a million years, but the old Riccis fascinate me with their intimate, innocent florality…..the solidity of the glass bottles, the packaging; all so reminiscent of eras long gone.

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I WAS ABDUCTED BY A LYCHEE SPACESHIP: CHAMPAGNE by YVES SAINT LAURENT (1991)

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It’s Sunday, and I’m off to the flea market in Shinagawa, Tokyo.

The flea market, where I have had such days of  excitement at finding prize vintage specimens that I thought my head would blow off: other Sundays when I come back emptyhanded; and then others with just some old miniature bottle or other that nevertheless  yields me pleasure.

I always love going there in case, and never feel less than brimming as I enter that space, with all the stalls and the endless possibilities………….

Over the years, despite some unbelievable bargains, I must have spent a fortune: I am extravagant by nature, and can barely hold back; but I do sometimes have brakes, just about; and a more fiscally conservative side of me can kick in occasionally when I just say NO.

But when you find an extraordinary bargain, but for whatever reason don’t buy it, the regret – a gnawing ache in the gut – can eat at you for years. I still have this pangy feeling about Champagne, once finding a very rare, 15ml parfum – boxed, glinting and golden- for about ten pounds. But I didn’t snap it up. The reason was simple – the flea market in Tokyo had yielded so many treasures that day that I simply couldn’t justify any more spending, especially with Duncan hovering owl-like at my shoulder. Doing the right thing, however, is often very dull and now I really wish I had, that I had secretly found some pretext and nipped back naughtily to go and buy it.

When Champagne (later changed to Yvresse due to a dull law suit by French wine producers), came out in 1991, I remember Helen and I rushing out to Rackhams in Birmingham to try it (these were the days when new perfume launches by the big houses were much rarer and so much more exciting, when  the new fragrances were unveiled with huge advertising blitzes and you wondered headily to yourself as you arrived through the doors just what will it smell like?)

But the startlingly fizzy, already-decaying-fruit-over-candied-chypre accord had Helen immediately clutching her two front teeth for fear they were melting, a sensation that is really quite visceral, but in the parfum, an old vintage creature whose powers had become exponentially stronger over the years, it was like nothing on earth.

One sniff: instantaneous molar meltdown; teeth fizzing away and piffing like sugary sherbet dips in rice paper. Just thinking about it even now gives me acheing urgings in my front two teeth. The parfum: a gigantic, neon-red, plutonium lychee spaceship glowing like a bawdy chypric message from another planet. Dazzling. Pulsating, and sending out strobes.

Without exaggeration I can say that it was probably the strongest thing I have ever smelled. It was spectacular, and I’d have loved to have owned it. Even touching the box was like fingering a nuclear reactor. It should have been part of my collection.

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THE DUSKY SLUMBERS: OMBRE MERCURE by TERRY DE GUNZBURG (2012) + LYS FUME by TOM FORD (2O12)

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Ombre Mercure is a woozy, classical modern – a salted, thicker Apres L’Ondée, diffused with the modernistic fumes of Violet Blonde, a touch of Une Fleur de Cassie, and some of the floral warmth of the first Gucci Eau de Parfum….

 

‘Reminiscent of loose powder, red lipstick and the classic chypres, it is especially designed for passionate characters’ says Mlle Gunzburg, a renowned makeup artist who released her first collection of fragrances last year, and I can quite easily imagine some people falling for this soft, gauzy perfume, which is definitely shadowy, as its name suggests, though not in the least mercurial.

 

Essentially an earthy iris butter with powdered violet over a ducksdown of patchouli, benzoin and musky vanilla, it is a very slow, drifting perfume, like mauve-reflected clouds in a painting. Seamless and unjarring; enveloping.

 

 

 

 

 

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What it lacks, though,  is that indefinable something, or ingredient – wit? – that would take it into the realms of the irisy sublime. On the other hand, its anchored slowness and immediate romantic appeal could easily make it someone’s signature.

 

 

 

 

 

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Lys Fumé is another immediately likeable perfume, though one that is not remotely worth its extravagant price tag. Having said that, it is an interesting take on the lily. Unlike many spotless, altar-inhabiting lilies, this is more like a lys of the underworld……….

 

As a part of the Jardin Noir collection, it succeeds in being, if not quite ‘smouldering’, then certainly, at the very least,  shifting and quixotic – a hip young Gucci-clad beauty sitting downstairs in some private members’ club, a bit unsure of herself, perhaps, but defiant. This perfume would rise in coils from her shoulders and slowly seduce.

 

 

The lilies are not smoked, as you might expect, but underlying the top notes of lily, mandarin and pink pepper, is a strange dusting of nutmeg and turmeric, an unusual note in a floral perfume that gives it a blurry, caliginous edge. A dollop of rum and a sultry base of styrax, oak and labdanum take this impression even further.

 

 

 

Lys Fumé is not as intriguing as I am perhaps making it out to be – like most Tom Ford perfumes there is something plasticky and self-conscious about the scent. At the same time, I can imagine being sat next to this girl with her fixed, restless gaze, and being intoxicated.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Filed under Flowers, Iris, Lily, Perfume Reviews, Powder, Violet

FOUR LILIES

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Lilies.

 

 

 

 

 

 

When you think of them, do you think of purity, death, religion?

 

Tumbling down from the pillars of a church, delicately imbued with the lucent breath of God?

 

 

Or are they sexual narcotics, their ochre-pollened stamens beckoning, and trembling, with powder?

 

 

 

 

 

LILIES AND SPICE / PENHALIGONS (2006)

 

 

Some lilies, like the stargazers, are the latter, their fragrance drowsy and ineluctable.

 

And Penhaligons – usually the epitome of propriety – have here released one of the best lily perfumes I have smelled.

 

It is stunning: a life-like portrait of living, breathing lily, spiced with clove and saffron, and with a well thought out erotic richness I wasn’t expecting.

 

 

 

 

FUNERAL HOME/ DEMETER

 

 

 

The cool breath of lilies and the casket. Crimson drapes; the light closed out.

 

 

Generic grieving of pipe organ (in the staff room they are drinking tea).

 

 

The lilies watch and permeate.

 

 

 

Other notes listed by Demeter: chrysanthemums (with stems and leaves), gladiolus. A hint of mahogany; ‘oriental carpet.’

 

 

 

 

UN LYS/ SERGE LUTENS (1997)

 

 

 

 

I once knew a man in Marseilles called David, who had already envisioned his death: asphyxiation in a room full of white lilies. If this pretentious self-indulgence were to prove hard to arrange, however, if the local florist didn’t quite oblige, he might alternatively just spray bottles of this perfume, and stage little ‘mini-deaths’ in preparation for the big day: suffocate himself on Lutens.

 

Un Lys is lilies, lilies, liles (white, and church-like); with an expiration of leaves, and a judicious addition of light vanilla in the dry down.

Lutens’ most conservative creation, its strait-lacedness works to its advantage. He and his perfumers have rendered, almost to perfection, white yearning Casablancas on the cusp of full opening.

 

 

 

LYS MEDITERANEE/ EDITIONS PARFUMS FREDERIC MALLE (2000)

 

 

 

The lilies described above are all beautiful renditions of this haunting and ambivalent bloom, but when Lys Mediteranée appears in the room it is like an Olympic champion has just walked in and all the others must cow their heads in respect.

 

This lily is luminescent.

 

It is dazzling, bright, white, green, almost hideously fresh and alive and quite wonderful if you want to actually physically

transmute into a lily.

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MITT, now you GIT on down to New Orleans right NOW and take out that MAN!!!!! I MEAN it!!!!!! (Senso, by Ungaro, 1991)

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Today I expect there will be a good few Republican vixens despairing across America with something like the facial expressions above. Tearing their teased, well-groomed hair in their master suites at the mere mention of their taxes being increased, their wealth being siphoned off by those hordes, now with health care and no longer dying in the streets, edging ever closer, and blacker, to their white-gated paradises….

 

 

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The first time I ever smelled Senso, I thought ‘Marietta’. Marietta: screeching, taloned harridan in her Texas satin dress, Lula’s hit-man devouring mother in Wild at Heart – David Lynch’s kaleidoscopic mash up of The Wizard of Oz and the classic road movie that mythologized the beauties and horrors of America,  all captured brilliantly in Diane Ladd’s interpretation of the gorgon, man-chewing  blonde: a matriarch who’d slit your throat at the flick of a switch, yet would be horrified at the mess. Come to think of it, this she wouldn’t do herself but instead would hire one of her ‘gentleman friends’ to do the job. The men love her; this dolly, come-thither old belle with her flaxen, Rapunzelesque hair; an uncurbed, materialistic witch who purses her rouge-caked mouth, smacks her lipsticked lips and immediately gets what she wants.

 

 

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You might be wondering what the connection could possibly be between evil ‘Tea Party’ crones, a wicked old witch of the west, and a long discontinued perfume by Ungaro. Well, leaving aside the fact that senso means ‘war’ in Japanese – Marietta Fortune’s war against Sailor (Nicolas Cage), the man who rejects her at some fundraiser in a public toilet – a humiliation that can only end in his death – there is the bottle, which is the most  exquisitely kitsch bottle I own, draped like a real Ungaro dress in the brightest shocking pink and hard enamelled baby blue. So belle of the ball, so…..Reagan.

 

To me it is a great flacon, and wouldn’t look out of place in Southfork, the poison dwarf weeping uncontrollably at her dresser, impetuously shattering her bottle of Senso against the mirror in some love and dollar-drenched tantrum.

 

 

And then you smell it – hit, blown away by the sheer voluptuous sweetness of the thing, a precarious tightrope balancing act of the glorious and the sickening; a perfume that aggregates rich domestic propriety with sex, just like Marietta, in her dream home: crawling, like a writhing, curvaceous beast under that glass coffee table; pursing and cooing and seducing the dumb, witless Johnnie Farragut.

 

We smell the newly washed carpets; the curtained, pink silken bedroom, the polish on the floor. And, especially, the laundry room, where the maid, off for the day, has left everything as a warm, puffed up refuge.

 

 

In Senso there’s a very comforting aura: the powerful sanctity of the washer and dryer –  the blithe reassurance of Downy – but, like Marietta, who ends up drooling, her face caked in blood-red lipstick, also an almost insanely sugared, libidinally ruinous bouquet of hysterical flowers, as though she has just fallen down and, watching her cocktail glass fall slowly to the shimmering tiles, wet herself desperately down among her tumble-dried whites: powderly, dirtily pink.

 

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Filed under Floriental, Perfume Reviews, Republican

THE GRASS IS NOT ALWAYS GREENER : Trophée by Lancome (1982), Central Park by Bond Nº 9 (2004), & Herba Fresca by Guerlain (1999)

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Central Park occupies a very important place in the mental scape of New Yorkers (and cinemagoers); it is the heart and lungs of the city. Bond No 9, a brand I have not had much success with, apparently wished to pay homage to this island of chlorophyll with a fragrance inviting us to ‘commemorate New York’s grand oasis of greenery; a lush sensory landscape that simulates a walk in the park’; a park, as we have seen in countless movies and soaps celebrating the metropolis, with joggers in visors and white shorts running every which way but loose; tennis courts, basketball, dogs a-larking, you name it – this is a place for the lovers of the outdoors.

 

 

Lancôme’s Trophée, another celebrator of green (discontinued but easily found online) has a similar, pastime on the lawns  theme; with a golfer on the bottle, and a golf ball as a stopper, its sporty, green-grass message couldn’t be more explicit.

 

 

 

 

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Trophée, while not desperately original (a slightly more masculine version of the seminal lemon-leaf eau fraîche, Ô de Lancôme) is a great fragrance you just can’t go wrong with; citrussy, natural, minty notes of lawns, verbena, and a gentle, chypre finish; bright, clean, refreshing. It is liberating: you can imagine a man in newly laundered polo shirt, up bright and early, splashing it on before a day out with his friends on the greens. The citrus notes don’t last so long, but the base is lovely too; a soothing note reminiscent of cold cream that makes me think of the aforementioned tired golfer in bed, later, with his wife; clean white sheets, late afternoon, the hot sun outside kept at bay with breezing white curtains.

 

 

Bond No 9’s scent begins with a vivid technicolour panorama of Central Park; vibrant green, grassy notes of verbena and basil, and a neroli note similar to Thierry Mugler’s cologne. Impressive. A  momentary, dazzling vista. And worn with Trophée on the other hand you might say it beats it, initially, in the lushness stakes. But Lancôme’s little known trophy has great subtlety. Bond No 9’s creation gets gradually worse, and worse, then even worse, as time passes.

 

 

Bond No9’s website informs us that

 

the park has its very own lawn bowling area. Here the terribly civilised pastimes of lawn bowling and croquet can be indulged without fear of colonial intervention.

 

 

Translated into perfume terms, that would mean, then, eschewing the classic (European) template for perfumery which dictates that a perfume, like a person, should fade and die gracefully, yet be anchored with earthy base notes to let it stay as long as possible; not botoxed and plumped to eternity.  The final accord in Central Park of ‘water jasmine’, ‘muguet’ and ‘cashmere musk’ sticks to the skin, irremovably, like a tattoo and is vile. If it is Central Park, then it is some obscure, forgotten corner; an oil-covered pigeon, stiff and festering, near some frayed, yellowing astroturf.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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GUERLAIN’S HERBA FRESCA : a ball of just discarded spearmint chewing gum; still fresh and ever so minty, left lying, alone, among the long, tall grass.

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Filed under Chypre, Grass, Green, Mint, Perfume Reviews, Verbena

ANIMAL IMPRINTS………… . EMPREINTE by COURREGES (1970) + LA NUIT by PACO RABANNE (1985)

 

 

 

 

 

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They kiss:  and the smear of her lipstick, the taste of her mouth, her hair, her skin – this scent, in all its complexity, kissed in a furl of hands, of gently undone white shirt and leather coat, is the imprint left on your lips: your eyes: your brain.

 

 

 

 

Fresh, light-pink top notes of peached rose, jasmine, artemisia, melon and bergamot – a most intriguing top accord – don’t attempt to mask the urgently animalic soft leather whip of the base, in a deliciously ambiguous chypre that is perverse, stylish, and clever.

 

 

 

 

Like a striding, soft-shelled armor of extreme chic, Empreinte, particularly in vintage parfum – though the eau de toilette has its own breathy exhalations – is an immaculate example of the genius of French perfumery as it once was – the layers of veneer, poise and sexuality, all concealed effortlessly beneath an outwardly respectable semblance of stilettoed, modish glamour.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

La Nuit, that petite, guileless maelstrom from Paco Rabanne, is Empreinte’s younger sister.

 

 

 

 

 

A wildebeest, in tulle, who wears tiny, summery floral-patterned cotton dresses, thigh-high, degenerate; but can barely keep them on herself for five minutes.

 

 

 

 

 

 

None of us mind in the least.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The pretty, fatty, fatigued pink floral departure of  jasmine and basil-tinted rose in this perfume cannot even begin to disguise the lust that is underpinning it; clinging, tongue-smearing civet, honey and beaver at alarmingly high dose (read into that what you will);  sweet woods, oak moss, patchouli, and musk. It is hard to imagine what the perfumer had in mind, but the result is certainly disturbing, arousing, and one of the most animalic commercial perfumes that was ever released:  a million miles away from the designer’s demurely fragranced beginnings (Calandre, Metal, and the later banalities that have come since this time such as XS Pour Elle, Black, and Lady Million). La Nuit was a sweet, grotesquely attractive eighties anomaly, and I’d always wanted to encounter someone who could carry it off successfully, as my own bottle is used only sparingly for private, night-time pleasure and reminiscence. I wondered though: what contemporary woman could possibly carry this off with the right combination of earnest love for what is ultimately a great scent, yet with a wink at its undoubted ridiculousness? A blonde, definitely, and in fact, since writing this, I have found my La Nuit girl;  Carla, night club chameleon, linguist, and make-up scientist from Australia. She tames it, makes it her own.

 

 

 

 

 

 

La Nuit also has a very sentimental place in my heart for a rather amusing reason. In 1987 or so, my father came back from a Paris business trip and, in a hurry, had mistakenly picked up a bottle of La Nuit, which he had thought was the classic Paco Rabanne Pour Homme, at duty free. He came in reeking of it – flowers; a rind of nymphomania – and we were in hysterics. It would have been scarcely possible to find a less suitable scent for him, and I smile every time to this day when I smell it. The bottle lay around the house, dusting and secretly loved by me in the outside veranda, for decades, where I would spray it in the air or on myself: imprinting, indelibly, its strange, lustful, piggy pinkness on my young, adolescent brain forever. It is a scent I thus know inside from out; a unique and bizarrely unintellectual scent that I can picture in my memory – that I can feel vividly in my smell brain, without even having to go upstairs to search for the bottle –  very intimately.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Vintage bottles of both of these scents can be found at online sites quite reasonably if you look.

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Filed under chypres